Mentors I Keep in My Life

The Word of God often speaks about the importance of whom we surround ourselves with. Psalm 1:1 communicates how we will essentially become whom we surround ourselves with. The Psalmist tells us that every person is susceptible of being highly influenced by presenting the progression of the man who eventually will walk, then stand and then sit with those he communes with.

I am fully aware that I am not excluded from this. Therefore, there are three specific types of people I have rigorously and intentionally kept in my life to ensure accountability:

Above

In Exodus 18, Jethro sees Moses as the only one playing the role of judge over the people of Israel. As someone more experienced and advances in years, he immediately is concerned and shares that it is “not good” because it is “too heavy” for him and the people. His father-in-law is able to see from a more holistic point of view and gives him advice to delegate able men.

My point? I believe that everyone should have those more seasoned (age and/or experience) that provide advice and instruction (Prov. 19:20). It is vital because they may see the bigger picture and have a healthier perspective. We would be wasting our time, effectiveness and efficiency in God’s Kingdom if we did not take heed of their words.

In my own life, I have had and have mentors that graciously extend their time, experiences, and wisdom with me. Some are seasonal – If I had a class with a certain professor, I would visit during office hours. Some are circumstantial – When I attend a conference or run into someone I know that lives above reproach, I quickly ask questions and pay close attention to their answers.

Some are vocational mentors – My previous education pastor has been in ministry for over 20 years. So when he began to mentor me, he helped me navigate through church politics (yuck), walked me through negotiating job descriptions and pay, and also gave me wisdom in balancing pastoral ministry, school, and family life as a newlywed.

Some were intentional – There are unique privileges and challenges that women ministers wrestle with, such as: What is the biblical view of women in church leadership? Are we only allowed to do children’s ministry? Does our husband need to be in pastoral ministry since most female pastors seem to be pastor’s wives? Is it possible for us to be strong yet submissive in our marriage?

I personally don’t have many women pastors advanced in their years in close proximity. Therefore, when I hear about a woman in ministry that is respectable, I contact her via email, text, or instagram and ask to grab coffee.

Some are divine – When I was a freshman in college, I met a friend whose love for the Lord and for people was so outrageous that I wanted what he had. So I followed him to every speaking engagement, read every book he recommended and would grab meals and coffee at any and every opportunity I got so that I could pick his brains about the things of the Kingdom. I often feel like Elisha. #toomuch? #doubleportionLord

Proverbs 11:14 “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.”

I am convinced that Joshua needed Moses, Elisha needed Elijah, and Timothy needed Paul to pour into them so that they could be and accomplish the task set before them. It is so important to have mentors above you that pour into you who are more seasoned in life.

Beside

As much as I have mentors pouring into me, I make sure I always have peers that are mutually being sharpened (Prov. 27:17) and encouraged (Rom. 1:12).

One group of peers is sisters that I pray with. This is a place I feel safe to be absolutely vulnerable and weak. We are all invited to share, confess, vent (in a godly way), and pray uniquely as women in ministry. We encourage one another in the faith and in the calling that God has placed in our lives.

Another group is my #sigmagirls. We met in college and have been friends for the past ten years! What I love about them is that these girls don’t give a crap (excuse my language) about how influential I am. They care about who I am as a person and can sense what is fake from a mile away. They keep me in check to preach with my life. 

These friends that run this race beside me allow myself to be seen, heard, and known with no pressure to be or become something.

Below  

Last but definitely not least, if we are being poured into, we need to make sure that we are pouring into other people’s lives. Jesus called us to “make disciples” (Matt. 28:19). I believe that we should always have a handful of people that God called us to that we minister to in order that they may become more like Christ through our love, wisdom, and guidance.

Psalm 145:4 “One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.”

To many in pastoral ministry, that may be your staff and your students. We pray for them, teach them, and guide them to live lives that glorify God. We bring correction, encouragement, and discipline into their lives.

For me, in my current season, it looks like a handful of people who has my heart. They are often on my mind and brought up in my prayers. They are welcomed to call and text me whenever and my priority is to always make myself available to them; whether it looks like an hour phone call or grabbing a meal or coffee. I give them front row seats to my strengths and weaknesses, struggles and revelations, marriage and home. It goes beyond teaching; it’s a call to pour into them, a call to do life with them.

1 Thessalonians 2:8 “So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you have become very dear to us.”

Not all three work simultaneously in the same intensity and tempo. Some of you may not have a mentor in your life. However, the great thing about that is that you can be to someone what you never had. I never had a female mentor meeting up with me to talk about ministry, friendship, church, work, dating, marriage, etc. But rather than being bitter that I never had that, I have a growing passion to be for others what I didn’t have, ready to be poured out (Phil. 2:17).

May we meet mentors and be mentors that we may live out God’s call upon our lives to be disciples and make disciples.